Just for Today

The past returned
without knocking,
bringing with it
the faces of my failures,
the moments I wish
I could gather back
and make gentle.

Guilt sat beside me
and whispered
that I should hurt,
that I deserved
to feel the chaos again.

For a moment,
I believed God
could not reach me there.

I thought He would not listen.
I thought perhaps
I should carry it alone.

And part of me
wanted the pain.

It was familiar.
It knew my name.
It felt easier
than forgiveness.

But then I remembered
the promise I had made
to turn away
from the thoughts
that pull me backward.

And I remembered
His promise too.

That He would meet me
in every wound.
That He would not turn away.
That no darkness in me
could make Him leave.

So I opened my hands
and gave Him
the guilt,
the memories,
the ache,
and the part of me
that still wanted to suffer.

And once again,
He restored me.

Not all at once.
Not forever in one moment.

But enough for today.

And when tomorrow comes,
I will give it to Him again.